"I Thought Love Was Only for the Young"...It Grows Stronger With Age [Experiment Note]

Survey of 10,000 Americans: An Average of Two Experiences of Love in a Lifetime
14% Say They "Never Felt It Even Once"
Little Difference by Age or Sexual Orientation

Editor's NoteDo you remember the marshmallow experiment that observed children's choices when told, "If you eat one now, you get one. If you wait, you get two"? Simple studies sometimes change how we see life. We take a fresh look at our daily lives through experimental data.

"Just as your youth is not a prize you earned through effort, my old age is not a punishment I received for doing something wrong."

A scene from the film Eungyo. The photo is not related to the specific content of the article. Eungyo.

This line from the film Eungyo is still often quoted today. At the time of its release, the film also sparked considerable controversy. That was because it told the story of love felt by a professor in his seventies for a 17-year-old high school girl, Eungyo. Some criticized the film for its explicit depiction of the desires of an older character.

Love is a rare experience...14% of respondents say they have never experienced passionate love

A recently published study shows that love is not the exclusive domain of any particular age group. Passionate love can be experienced again at various points in life, and older adults are no exception.

According to the results of a large-scale survey conducted by the Kinsey Institute in the United States and published on February 9 in the international journal of interpersonal relations "Interpersona," which targeted about 10,000 Americans between the ages of 18 and 99, respondents reported that they had experienced "passionate love" an average of about two times in their lives.

Among the respondents, 14% said they had "never experienced passionate love in their lifetime," while 28% said they had experienced it once. The rest reported having experienced it two or more times.

The photo is not related to any specific content of the article. Pixabay.

"Love is not the exclusive domain of any particular generation or group"

The most striking finding is the breakdown by age group. A higher proportion of older adults than younger adults responded that they had experienced passionate love more frequently. This runs counter to the common belief that love belongs to the young.

The fact that older adults reported more experiences of passionate love may have been influenced by increased life expectancy and changing social perceptions. Compared to the past, the barriers to divorce and remarriage have lowered, and the burden of starting new relationships has also eased. The longer people live, the more opportunities they have to encounter love.

The study also found that differences by sexual orientation were not large. The frequency of passionate love experiences was generally similar among heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual respondents. This suggests that love is not an emotion confined to any particular group or generation.

The researchers evaluated these findings as meaningful for expanding relationship theory. They particularly focused on the fact that passionate love is not as frequent as people might think, and that more than 1 in 10 adults reported never having experienced passionate love in their lifetime. The researchers wrote, "Acknowledging the rarity of passionate love can be a starting point for not devaluing other forms of love," adding, "Beyond excitement and intensity, care, trust, and companionate bonds are also fully meaningful forms of love."

In the film Eungyo, love and youth are portrayed as inseparable. The professor in his seventies dreams of a romance with Eungyo and, in his imagination, returns to his younger days. Empirical findings likewise show that passionate love tends to stand out more strongly in younger years. However, the study also confirmed that this does not mean passionate love is an emotion confined only to a specific age group.

The message of this study is that love is not a privilege of any particular generation, but a feeling that can recur at various stages of life. It invites us to reconsider when love might come into our lives.