"Kkuak, I'm Dying": 22-Year-Old Who Kept His Humor Through Rare Cancer Changes Japan's Donation Culture [Japan Insight]

The Late Kanaru Nakayama
Shared Witty Cancer Diary on SNS
Scheduled Post Predicting His Own Death Goes Viral
Wave of Donations in Japan, Where Giving Is Rare

Every year in Japan, online platform operators announce the "Top 100 Internet Buzzwords" that trended on social networking services (SNS) throughout the year. This year, the phrase "Kkuak, I'm dying" (グエ-死んだンゴ) made the list. These words were the last message left on X (formerly Twitter) by a 22-year-old young man who never lost his sense of humor, even while battling a rare cancer. Is it possible to leave such a positive message while foreseeing one's own death? Remarkably, this phrase even inspired a wave of donations among the younger generation. Today, we share the story of the late Kanaru Nakayama, who passed away last October.

Nakayama, born in 2003, was an ordinary young man who was passionate about guitar and tennis during his school days. After taking a gap year, he entered the science and engineering department at Hokkaido University. He loved electric guitar and bass so much that he became the president of a related club, and was said to get along well with others.

The appearance of Kanaru Nakayama, who is battling illness. NHK.

After entering university, he occasionally experienced back pain or swelling, but the discomfort was minor, so he did not think much of it. However, during summer vacation, he noticed a lump growing larger, underwent a thorough examination, and was diagnosed with epithelioid sarcoma in October 2023. This is a rare cancer with only about 20 cases per year in Japan. The tumor had attached to his ribs, so he underwent immediate surgery. The operation was so extensive that part of his back muscles and the affected ribs were removed, making it difficult for him to walk. Nevertheless, as soon as he was able to walk again, he returned to his part-time job and attended university classes, continuing his daily life. When his parents offered to drive him, he would get upset, insisting he could manage on his own.

While maintaining his daily rhythm, he continued to post his hospital diary on his blog and X. When he was first diagnosed, he uploaded a post titled "It's Huge! (デカスギイ！)" detailing his hospital experiences leading up to the diagnosis. Even then, he lightened the mood with humor, writing things like, "I had my first CT scan ever. But it was over so quickly, it wasn't even interesting."

Collection of Mr. Nakayama's cancer battle stories posted on his blog. Nakayama Blog.

After surgery and chemotherapy, he thought he had recovered somewhat, but a year later, he was told the cancer had recurred. He was even told that his one-year survival rate was less than 50%. However, according to his parents, Nakayama did not cry or despair upon hearing this news. Instead, he calmly posted on his blog, "It has recurred. Unlucky. Complaining won't help, so I'll try to turn this into something interesting." After that, he began serializing his cancer battle stories under the title "Something Too Big, In Other Words, About Cancer."

In his posts, he affirmed his own life and shared stories that encouraged others in their daily lives. For example, he commented on a post by an underweight teenager surviving on salads due to an eating disorder, saying, "Let's stop eating things like that and enjoy something delicious." Even as his condition worsened, he posted self-deprecating jokes like, "Panicking won't cure my cancer, so I guess I'll just have to look forward to my next life," or "Turns out gaming takes more stamina than I thought." Even when he entered a hospice ward last September, he wrote, "I have no idea how long I'll live, but I hope I can enjoy each day. I hope you all enjoy the rest of your summer vacation, too."

About a month later, he uploaded a post saying, "I think I might die soon," and two days after that, on October 12, he passed away. The very next day, on the 13th, Nakayama's friend announced the news of his passing, thanking everyone who had supported him.

Mr. Nakayama's usual X account. Following the obituary news delivered by a friend on October 13, 2025, a scheduled post saying "Kkuak, I'm dying" was uploaded on the 14th. X.

Then, on the following day, the 14th, another post suddenly appeared on Nakayama's account: "Kkuak, I'm dying." It turned out Nakayama had scheduled this post in anticipation of his death, and it was uploaded as planned. While loosely translated, this slang is used on Japanese SNS to mean "I'm doomed" when someone is in a tight or awkward spot. Even knowing his own death was imminent, Nakayama tried to turn it into a moment of laughter until the very end. After the scheduled post was uploaded, it drew tremendous attention online as a "quirky post uploaded after death," recording as many as 360 million views. Netizens responded with humorous condolences, saying things like "May you rest in peace."

Soon after, something remarkable happened in Japan. Donations began pouring in as condolence funds for Nakayama. The Hokkaido Cancer Center, where he had been hospitalized, received 1,248 donations in November alone, totaling 5,218,000 yen (about 48.04 million won). In fact, there had been zero donations to the hospital that year before Nakayama's death, leaving even the hospital staff surprised. During the same period, the Cancer Research Foundation received 2,400 donations, and the Osumi Basic Science Foundation, which supports basic cancer research, received 2,000 donations.

Japanese media reported this as a "rare occurrence." Japan is known to have a less active donation culture compared to other countries. In a survey on donation culture published by a British charity, Japan ranked lowest among 101 countries in terms of the percentage of annual income donated. That such a wave of donations occurred here is indeed extraordinary and noteworthy.

These days, Nakayama's father is said to be repeatedly reading the posts his son left behind. Friends also frequently visit the house, bringing snacks and drinks to honor his memory.

On SNS, it is common for people to clash over differing opinions, and even small comments often spark attacks. But Nakayama's final message brought about the opposite reaction. His attitude of not losing his sense of humor even in difficult times briefly changed the atmosphere of an online space accustomed to criticism and cynicism. May he rest in peace.