Recognition from In-Laws Relieves Holiday Fatigue for Divorcees: Men Value Ability, Women Value Effort

Reference photo to aid understanding of the article. Photo by Bienarae

Divorcees, often referred to as "returned singles," reported that during their married life with their former spouses, the fatigue of Chuseok and other holidays would disappear if men were recognized for their abilities by their in-laws, and if women were acknowledged for their efforts by their husband's families.

On October 8, remarriage information company Only-You, in collaboration with marriage information agency Bienarae (CEO Son Donggyu), conducted a survey from October 1 to 7 targeting 556 men and women (278 men and 278 women) nationwide who wish to remarry (including those seeking remarriage later in life). The survey was conducted via email and phone and asked, "During your married life with your former spouse, what did your in-laws do during Chuseok that completely relieved your fatigue?"

According to the results, 33.1% of men responded "recognition of ability," while 35.3% of women answered "recognition of effort," making these the most common responses for each gender. The next most frequent answer was "being treated without formality" (24.5% for men, 25.2% for women).

The third most common response was "recognition of effort" for men (20.1%) and "when the burden was reduced" for women (19.1%). The fourth most common answer was "when they were especially considerate" (15.5% for men, 13.2% for women).

For the second question, "What was the phrase you disliked hearing the most from your in-laws during Chuseok before your divorce?" 32.0% of men cited "Stay the night," while 31.3% of women cited "Simplify things after I pass away" as their top answers. The second most common response for both men and women was "Have another meal before you go" (27.0% for men, 24.4% for women).

For third place and below, men cited "Wait until your wife's siblings (sister-in-law, brother-in-law, etc.) arrive before you leave" (21.6%) and "Take some food with you" (13.3%). Women cited "Stay the night" (22.7%) and "Wait until your husband's siblings (sister-in-law, brother-in-law, etc.) arrive before you leave" (14.4%).

For the third question, "What do you like most about spending Chuseok as a single after divorce?" men cited "not having to expend unnecessary emotional energy" (31.3%) and "not having to worry about expenses" (24.1%) as their top two responses. Women cited "not having to pretend to be cheerful" (31.7%) and "not having to expend unnecessary emotional energy" (28.1%) as their top two answers.

For the third most common response, both men and women chose "being able to enjoy free time" (20.8% for men, 19.4% for women). The fourth most common response was "not having to pretend to be cheerful" for men (17.3%) and "not having to see people I dislike" for women (14.0%).

Son Donggyu, CEO of Only-You, commented, "Recently, preparations for holidays like Chuseok have become much simpler. The older generation needs to understand the physical and emotional burdens their children experience when preparing for ancestral rites, while the younger generation should adopt a positive attitude toward accepting these traditional holidays that have been passed down for generations."