[Book Sip] "Try Looking at Yourself Like a Neighbor"

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The author, who lost their entire twenties to depression that began in their early twenties and once tried to give up on life, introduces the 'Low-Speed Living Method' they mastered after nine years of effort. Depression is like a chronic illness, making it difficult to overcome by willpower alone. The method the author recommends to such people is low-speed living. This means lowering expectations for oneself and viewing oneself with the energy of a neighborhood person rather than as the main character. It emphasizes a lifestyle attitude aiming for slight improvement rather than complete recovery.

I had nothing to boast about, and I even lived making various small mistakes. The last time I attempted suicide but failed was four years ago. At that time, I was truly at the 'bottom' of depression. Having survived that, I thought, 'Since I’ve already died once, the rest of my life is a bonus. For the second act of my life, instead of being the main character, why not live as a supporting character, a neighborhood person?' From then on, I started living moderately. Then I thought, 'Oh? The second act of life is surprisingly enjoyable? Being a neighborhood person isn’t so bad?' - From 'Introduction'

When you think that you only need to do valuable things for the 'precious people' right in front of you rather than praise from invisible people in the world, life becomes simple and clear. And by making others happy, you can ultimately become happy yourself. It’s okay not to become a superstar. Being helpful to someone is what you, living in reality rather than in stories, should aim for. - From 'Stage 1 Mindset'

A common advice from psychiatrists and psychology experts is 'morning walks.' "Sunlight increases serotonin secretion, which stabilizes the mind and helps recover from depression. So, let’s develop the habit of waking up early and taking a walk." Surely, this is based on solid evidence from experiments. But as someone who has experienced it firsthand, I often feel, 'Something about this doesn’t seem right.' Simply put, 'If that were possible for someone, they wouldn’t have depression.' For those of us already suffering from depression, it’s quite a high hurdle. Even when I tried to do it, it rarely worked, and I only sank deeper into gloom. This is what I personally experienced. - From 'Stage 3 Lifestyle Habits'

The method I use is to quantify 'how much stress I feel from a person' on a scale from plus 10 to minus 10. Minus means a person who causes stress, and plus means a person who, rather than causing stress, makes you feel positive when you’re with them. For people around minus 2 or 3, I subtly 'let it slide.' For people who bring me down every time I talk to them, those at minus 10, I 'run away unconditionally.' Since we are adults, it’s hard to slip away quietly, so I keep contact to necessary matters only. I set my own rules like minimizing work, limiting conversation time, and never engaging in non-work-related talk. - From 'Stage 4 Relationships'

Many who have depression might relate to this: on days when you think, 'I must work hard tomorrow,' your condition inevitably collapses. On such days, I find it hard to fall asleep or get restful sleep. The reason is that I think, 'I need to manage my condition.' It’s like tormenting a child you love. The more you consciously try, the more you do the opposite. And you get the undesired result (in this case, being disliked by the child you love). Humans are truly a mystery. - From 'Stage 5 Work'

Just thirty years old. Nine years since depression began, many things have happened. I despaired of this world, but I didn’t even have the courage to die. I had no choice but to live by elimination. I have spent my time thinking about ways to live even a little joyfully. I want to say once again: I am an 'ordinary person.' I believe there is not much difference between you reading this book now and me. The difference is only in the 'time spent thinking about how to live joyfully.' Even after publishing this book, I intend to keep thinking endlessly about 'what is necessary to live joyfully despite depression' until I die. - From 'Conclusion'

Low-Speed Living Method for the Lethargic | Written by Derasang | Translated by Won Sunmi | Sejong Books | 264 pages | 19,000 KRW