Reunion of Mother and Daughter After 40 Years with Police Help: "Mom, I Missed You"

Fled Due to Domestic Violence, Reported Missing
Unable to Locate for 5 Years, Declared Deceased

A woman in her 30s who ran away from home due to domestic violence reunited with her biological daughter after 40 years with the help of the police.

According to Yonhap News on the 27th, the police at Jungbu Police Station in Daejeon found A (71), who had been reported missing long ago and declared dead, and arranged a reunion with her daughter B (48) on the 25th.

Mother and daughter reunion after 40 years at Daejeon Jungbu Police Station
[Photo by Daejeon Jungbu Police Station/ Yonhap News]

In 1984, A, who lived in Daerim-dong, Yeongdeungpo-gu, Seoul, fled her home after enduring her husband's repeated jealousy and domestic violence. It was later found that she had lived alone in Daejeon without any connections for 40 years. With the help of an acquaintance in Daejeon, she worked at a small grocery store and lived alone until recently.

When A ran away, she had two daughters aged 8 and 6. A’s husband traveled around the country on a motorcycle looking for her but died in an accident five years later at the age of 41.

B and her younger sister, who became orphans overnight, were raised with the help of their maternal aunts. They waited for A and reported her missing 10 years after she left home. Even after that, A’s whereabouts were unknown for five years, and she was legally declared dead by the court’s missing person ruling.

A said she never forgot her two daughters for a moment. She visited the neighborhood near where they lived and also near her parental home because she missed her daughters. However, fear of her husband and trauma from the abuse repeatedly made her give up entering the house and turn back. Years later, A went to the community service center to get some documents and accidentally found out she had been declared dead. She then gave up on finding her family.

She still kept the childcare diary of her daughter that she took when she ran away from home. While investigating A’s personal information, the police confirmed she had been declared dead. The Women and Youth Division of Jungbu Police Station then identified the address of her eldest daughter B through the family information A remembered. A had remembered her daughter’s resident registration number exactly even after 40 years.

The police confirmed that B lived in Ansan, Gyeonggi Province, and visited her to convey her mother’s story. Eventually, B responded to the reunion, and the mother and daughter met after 40 years. A said, “After hearing about my daughter from the police, I went out of the house that night and shouted for joy.” B said, “I had no resentment toward my mother, and I’m so happy to meet her now. When I heard I could meet my mother, I couldn’t believe it,” reportedly crying.

The police also connected A, who suffers from chronic illnesses such as vocal cord nodules, to the social welfare team at Catholic University Daejeon St. Mary’s Hospital so she could receive a health checkup.

Meanwhile, a recent survey revealed that 7 out of 10 domestic violence perpetrators are men. The Korea Domestic Violence Counseling Center analyzed counseling statistics of 524 domestic violence offenders who were ordered counseling and protective measures by the Seoul Family Court and others under the Act on Special Cases Concerning the Punishment of Domestic Violence (Domestic Violence Punishment Act) over the past year and announced these results.

According to the counseling center, 374 (71.3%) were men and 150 (28.6%) were women, showing that most perpetrators were male. The relationship between perpetrators and victims was mostly spouses, accounting for 80.4%. Also, more than half of the perpetrators were in their 30s and 40s, with 40s (29.4%) and 30s (22.1%) being the most common age groups.