[W Frontier] Jina Young "I am the captain of my life, the answer to life is within me"

2021 Asia Women Leaders Forum 10th Cohort Mentor
Jinayoung, Professor of Child Psychiatry at Kennedy Krieger Institute, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

There is no need to do something just because of expectations from others or society

My one and only life is too precious to live worrying about others' opinions

Photo by Jinayoung, provided by Kennedy Krieger Institute, Department of Psychiatry, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

[Asia Economy Reporter Hyunju Lee] "When you look at life a little longer, there rarely seems to be a case where you must do something just because of the expectations of the present moment, those around you, or society. It's not that such cases don't exist at all, but I think it would be good to muster a bit more courage and develop the ability and skills to politely say what needs to be said and do what needs to be done. If you live honestly with yourself but without being rude, life may not be smooth, but I believe there will be fewer regrets."

On the 21st, Professor Ji Nayoung, a pediatric psychiatrist at the Kennedy Krieger Institute of Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, said in an email interview with Asia Economy, "I recommend not being too afraid and training yourself to endure uncomfortable situations flexibly rather than trying to avoid them."

Professor Ji said, "No matter what the social atmosphere is, if it goes against my values and the life I pursue, there is no need to necessarily follow it," and shared her own story, saying, "Living with this mindset sometimes leads to disadvantages." She recalled, "When I was an intern, some male resident doctors made disparaging remarks about women, and I did not stay silent but pointed out the contradiction. One of those doctors got very angry at me, calling me a very 'improper' intern. My intern grades were not very good, and I also failed to get into the residency program. However, I now think that failure was a blessing in disguise because it became the reason I came to the United States."

Professor Ji graduated from Daegu Catholic University School of Medicine and completed her internship at Uijeongbu St. Mary's Hospital. She applied to the psychiatry residency program she wanted but was rejected. While preparing to reapply, she impulsively boarded a plane to the U.S. with the goal of obtaining a U.S. medical license. She planned to study for only one year and return, but after passing the U.S. medical licensing exam with top scores, she decided to apply for residency in the U.S. She then worked at Harvard Medical School's Neuroimaging Research Center, was accepted into the psychiatry residency at the University of North Carolina School of Medicine, completed a pediatric psychiatry fellowship at the same university, and is currently a faculty member in the pediatric psychiatry department at Johns Hopkins and its affiliated Kennedy Krieger Institute.

Be honest with yourself
Live without being rude
Even if life is not smooth, regrets will be few

'You are doing well'
Say this to yourself

While establishing herself as a pediatric psychiatry professor, Professor Ji was suddenly diagnosed with postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS) and neuro-mediated hypotension. These are disorders where the autonomic nervous system fails to regulate pulse and blood pressure autonomously. Although not rare diseases, they are difficult to diagnose. Professor Ji suffered from severe headaches, dizziness, and pathological fatigue due to this illness, and at times could not sit upright by her own will for even 15 minutes.

When she first heard the diagnosis, Professor Ji said she had a vague confidence that she could overcome it. However, despite her strenuous efforts, the symptoms did not improve and sometimes worsened, leading her to realize, "This is a disease I cannot overcome by willpower alone." After becoming ill, she felt this more deeply. Her motto is "Follow my heart." Professor Ji said, "Since the energy and time I have to move are very limited, living for things I don't truly want to do or to avoid disappointing others has become too precious a waste of my life."

Professor Ji advises never to forget that "I am the captain of my life." She said, "In this vast world, the answer to where I want to sail, where I want to go, and how I want to spend my life lies within me," and added, "Comparing myself to others or living according to what my parents or society expect of me is something that needs to be reconsidered carefully, and the direction of my voyage should be adjusted accordingly."

Professor Ji also experiences setbacks in daily life. Each time, she deliberately tells herself, "You are doing well." She explained, "'You are doing well' does not mean 'You are number one or the best.' It means encouraging and comforting yourself for doing as much as you can with the knowledge, experience, and abilities you have in your given environment and position." She continued, "Unfortunately, the self-critical and blaming voices inside us often stem from internalized negative feedback received in childhood from parents, teachers, and others' gazes," and emphasized, "All the more reason we need to say 'You are doing well' to ourselves, words we may not have heard enough as children."

Quoting Sister Joan Chittister's words, "We are not here to win. We are here to grow," Professor Ji said, "We cannot always win, nor do we need to. If we live diligently today and learn and grow a little more tomorrow, we are doing very well." Finally, she reiterated, "This one and only life given to us is too precious to live as someone else's."