Men Are More Sensitive to Financial Demands, Women to Household and Role Expectations
Experts: "Differences in Role Expectations and Practical Burdens Easily Lead to Conflict"
According to a recent survey, the behaviors that cause the greatest aversion among divorcees who continue dating with remarriage in mind differ significantly between men and women. Men are most put off by partners who avoid paying after a date, while women are most uncomfortable with negative comments about ex-spouses.
Among divorcees who continue dating with remarriage in mind, the behaviors that cause the greatest dislike differ significantly between men and women. (Photo for article understanding only, unrelated to the content.) Pixabay
Onriyu and Vienarae, two remarriage information agencies, surveyed 514 divorced men and women nationwide (257 men and 257 women each) about "words and actions that decrease likability during remarriage dating." On December 7, they reported that 31% of male respondents cited leaving the table without paying for a meal as the top turn-off. Meanwhile, 33% of female respondents pointed to critical remarks or attitudes toward ex-wives as the biggest negative factor.
For men, the next most disliked behaviors were: ▲negative comments about an ex-husband (26.5%), ▲excessive boasting about one’s past career or appearance (21.0%), and ▲demeaning attitudes toward restaurant staff (15.2%). For women, the most uncomfortable behaviors were: ▲preferring to resolve matters over the phone rather than meeting in person (25.2%), ▲boasting about the past (19.1%), and ▲rude behavior toward service industry workers (14.0%).
When asked which remarks could destabilize a relationship in the context of dating with remarriage in mind, men and women responded differently. Among men, 32.7% said that a suggestion to "go to a high-end restaurant" was the most burdensome, followed by ▲requests to buy luxury goods (27.6%), ▲requests for support with children’s tuition (22.2%), and ▲requests to care for parents (12.1%).
In contrast, 38.9% of women identified the request to "prepare breakfast" as the most off-putting remark. This was followed by ▲requests to support elderly parents (27.2%), ▲suggestions for fine dining (16.0%), and ▲requests for luxury gifts (12.1%).
Experts interpret these differences as resulting from practical concerns and fixed role stereotypes that become particularly sensitive during the remarriage process. A Vienarae representative explained, "If a woman rarely pays for dates but persistently requests expensive restaurants, a man may feel he is being taken advantage of. Likewise, in a society where dual-income households are common, a man asking for breakfast to be prepared may be perceived as enforcing outdated gender roles."
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