A New Employee Who Gave 50,000 Won as Wedding Gift Asked by Senior Colleague, "Was There Anything Disappointing?"

After the Wedding, "Is There Anything You're Upset About?" Criticism Arises
Guests Still Struggle Over Appropriate Amount for Wedding Gifts

Recently, as prices have risen sharply, the controversy over the 'appropriate amount' of congratulatory money for weddings has resurfaced. A story has emerged about an office worker who gave 50,000 won as congratulatory money at a senior colleague's wedding and was rebuked with the question, "Have I ever disappointed you?" On the 19th, an online community post titled "I gave 50,000 won as congratulatory money at my senior's wedding yesterday, did I do something wrong?" was uploaded.

The writer, A, who introduced themselves as a newcomer to society, attended a senior colleague's wedding recently and gave 50,000 won as congratulatory money. A said, "The senior asked, 'Are you sure you gave 50,000 won? Have I ever disappointed you?'" and lamented, "Is it right to say such things when I took time out of my busy schedule to attend?" A added, "I have no intention of inviting that senior when I get married," but also said, "Since the company I work for is small, I thought it would be difficult not to attend, so I went."

As prices have recently risen sharply, sparking renewed debate over the "appropriate amount" for wedding gifts, a story has emerged about an office worker who gave 50,000 won as a wedding gift to a senior colleague and was rebuked with the comment, "Have I ever made you feel disappointed?" Photo by Yonhap News

Among netizens who read A's story, opinions were sharply divided between those who said "Considering today's prices, 100,000 won is appropriate" and those who argued, "No one forced guests to have the wedding at an expensive place." One netizen wrote, "Nowadays, meal costs alone often exceed 50,000 won, so 100,000 won is the basic amount for congratulatory money," adding, "Giving 50,000 won and eating the meal actually results in a loss. Isn't that too stingy for a company colleague?" There was also a claim that "The common practice is to give 100,000 won if attending the wedding and 50,000 won if not."

On the other hand, there were criticisms that it is inappropriate to pass on the 'expensive meal cost' chosen by the couple directly to the guests. One netizen pointed out, "No one forced them to have the wedding at an expensive place. Is the purpose of a wedding to collect money?" There were also opinions criticizing A's senior's calculating attitude. One office worker commented, "If you calculate based on the weekend minimum wage, the bride and groom should actually be paying the guests," adding, "Shouldn't it just be about exchanging feelings of congratulations and gratitude for attending?"

Is '50,000 won' appropriate when not attending a wedding? Unmarried men and women say "This amount" is suitable for congratulatory money

A's dilemma and conflict over the amount of congratulatory money is not unique. As prices have risen sharply recently, more people are struggling with how much to give as congratulatory money.

The congratulatory money pledged "if attending" was shown to be an average of 86,300 KRW. By gender, it was 93,500 KRW for men and 79,000 KRW for women, and by age group, it was 88,300 KRW for those in their 20s and 84,200 KRW for those in their 30s. The amount to be given "if not attending" was shown to be an average of 60,400 KRW.
[Photo by Kim Dahee, Asia Economy]

According to a survey conducted by the marriage information company Gayeon at the end of last November on 500 unmarried men and women (ages 25-39, 250 each), the biggest factor in deciding the amount of congratulatory money was 'closeness and length of acquaintance with the person' at 86.8%. This was followed by 'whether the person will attend my wedding in the future (5.6%)', 'wedding venue and meal cost (5.4%)', 'whether a physical invitation card was delivered (2%)', and 'others (0.2%)'.

The average amount of congratulatory money given 'when attending' was 86,300 won. By gender, men gave 93,500 won and women 79,000 won; by age, those in their 20s gave 88,300 won and those in their 30s gave 84,200 won. The average amount given 'when not attending' was 60,400 won. Men gave 64,600 won, women 56,100 won; 20s gave 61,000 won, and 30s gave 59,700 won. Generally, men and people in their 20s tended to think the amount should be higher than women and those in their 30s. It seems that people in their 20s pay more attention because they hear less about weddings among their acquaintances.

A Gayeon representative said, "The emerging debate over congratulatory money reflects economic burdens and changes in human relationships. In the past, it was natural to marry as you got older, but nowadays marriage is not considered essential, so this issue tends to arise more." They added, "Congratulatory money originally had the concept of mutual exchange, but among some MZ generation members, if they think they won't get it back, they prefer not to give or receive it. The essential thing is to take time to celebrate one of the most important events in life."