[Holiday Hell] Couples and Generational Conflicts Lead to Avoiding Hometowns

[Asia Economy Reporter Jeong Dong-hoon] #Shim Seung-il (30, pseudonym), who is preparing for the police officer exam, did not head to his hometown, Naju in Jeollanam-do, this year. Although he was willing to go through the ticket booking battle to see his parents, he ultimately gave up on returning home after recalling the sarcastic remarks from relatives during last Chuseok. Comments like "What good is graduating from a good university if you're still just playing around..." and "I heard they’re hiring a lot of police officers, but you still haven’t made it?" were common. Shim said, "It’s unfortunate that the stress caused by unhelpful interference makes me reluctant to go back to my hometown."

During the Lunar New Year holiday, more people are avoiding their hometowns due to conflicts between generations and couples. The family gatherings during holidays have ironically become a trigger for family conflicts. From sharing household chores like holiday meals and ancestral rites to stresses related to employment and marriage, the holiday season is a collection of various pressures. Unlike the explanations from relatives that these are just harmless questions, younger generations perceive the barrage of questions every holiday as an invasion of privacy.

The 'holiday stress' caused by conflicts between parents’ and children’s generations has become a norm. According to a survey conducted by job portal Saramin on 927 adults ahead of last year’s Chuseok, 54.3% responded that they experience holiday stress. Among unmarried children, 51.3% (multiple responses allowed) identified 'parents' as the source of stress. Additionally, 33.3% reported having had disputes with family or relatives during holidays.

Marital conflicts intensify around the holidays. Seo Hye-yoon (34), who has been married for two years, said, "We promised to travel during the holidays, but married life hasn’t turned out that way. Every holiday, having to prepare food and set up the ancestral rites table makes the holiday feel like an extension of labor rather than a break." She plans to travel abroad separately from her husband, who will be visiting his hometown during the Lunar New Year holiday.

There is also an observed increase in divorce cases around the holidays. According to the 'Divorce Statistics for the Last 5 Years' by the Court Administration and Statistics Korea, the number of divorces in February to March and October to November?right after the Lunar New Year and Chuseok holidays?was on average 11.5% higher than the previous month. Domestic violence cases also rose. According to the National Police Agency, reports of domestic violence during last year’s Lunar New Year and Chuseok were 954 and 1,019 cases respectively, which is 44.5% and 54.4% higher than the daily average of 660 cases.

Professor Oh Yoon-ja of Kyung Hee University’s Department of Child and Family Studies said, "To avoid conflicts, communication within families should be based on facts rather than emotions. The parent generation should not perceive value clashes with their children as a 'shift in power' but rather as consideration for a generation raised in a different environment."