[The Editors' Verdict] Another Perspective on the Stalking Case

[Asia Economy Jung Jae-hyung, Managing Editor of Economic Finance]

The Sindang Station stalking murder case is provoking public outrage. While the 2016 'Gangnam Station murder case' was a crime targeting unspecified women, this case involved illegally filming and stalking a female colleague who joined the company at the same time, and the crime was committed in a premeditated manner. The reason the public feels even more serious shock and fear is the anxiety that harm can come from someone close.

Although I am not well-versed in psychology, it seems there is a significant difference between men and women. There is a well-known illustration. When reflected in a mirror, men see themselves as potbellied and unattractive but think of themselves as handsome and muscular. On the other hand, women, even if they have a fairly good figure, see themselves as fat when looking in the mirror.

The difference between men and women seems to be this: men think they are great even if they are lacking, while women think they are insufficient even if they are fine.

In Korea, this tendency is even more distinctive. Korean mothers still prefer sons. They favor sons over daughters and dislike seeing their sons feel discouraged. Korean sons have lived under their mothers' protection hearing phrases like "You are excellent" and "You are great." Therefore, Korean men tend to be accustomed to positive responses and sensitive and delicate to negative responses. So when they are rejected or receive negative feedback, they can feel self-loathing and anger.

The social atmosphere that excessively enforces masculinity and femininity is also a problem. When a nurse is male, people look at him with suspicion, and when a flight attendant is male, people feel uncomfortable. If a woman works in a physically demanding job, she is viewed strangely and prejudged. When marrying, it is thought that the man's social status or salary should be higher than the woman's. Although gender discrimination has decreased significantly, such discrimination still remains in social perceptions.

This has been the world until now. However, the world is changing a lot. Men who lived well under Korean mothers still want to be favored, but today's women want to live in a new world different from the past. The awareness that women should work and be treated equally has become natural, and this will become the norm in the future.

We are currently in a transitional period. Most women have changed, but some men have not changed yet. This is causing conflicts.

Women no longer think men are great. They believe they should compete on an equal footing and consider themselves autonomous. They are economically independent and play sufficient roles in society.

However, some men still live as they did in the past. These people are causing problems now. The perception that "if you knock ten times, a tree will fall" is problematic. In reality, even if you knock ten times, it does not fall.

In the past, men led relationships between men and women. Women tended to be subordinate and passively follow men, but now that is not the case. Women are sufficiently choosing men, leading, and actively guiding the relationship. The number of couples where the woman is older and the man is younger is also increasing.

Men, lower your arrogance and adapt to reality.